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When is it time to end a relationship?
Things build up. Something feels off. The magic has faded. Or maybe you’re just not happy anymore. Whatever it is that’s causing this burning question to rise to the top – it’s not going away. So you have to figure out if this skepticism is permanent, or just a phase. Tough call. Read More
We know what normally happens. You look in the mirror, and immediately start picking it apart. Your thighs are too big. Your ankles are too small. Your chin is seeing double. We know the feeling. But the problem is, you’re completely ignoring the things that make you unique! It’s time to pour love back into ourselves and grow to love ourselves for exactly who we are.
You hottie, you.
Here’s how to have a positive body image:
And if you’re reading this, it’s probably super hard for you because it’s a few days after the clock struck midnight. But that’s ok, we totally relate. We know it’s a struggle. Take last year for example. I’m sure many of you were all like, ‘should I be all ambitious and crap and give up carbs? But wait, that will probably die out in by time Valentines rolls around…eh…ok. Maybe I should just stop biting my nails. But is that enough? Should I do more? Oh forget it. This is all too complicated, I’m getting cheese fries.’
It was only last year that Blush launched from a tiny apartment in Austin, Texas. None of us were really sure what to expect, or how things were going to go. We figured we would be lucky if we helped a handful of girls, spread a few messages, and taught some lessons here and there. But let us tell you–we were stunned at how things turned out in 2014. We are over the moon in giddiness….we can’t believe this is our job! Most days it honestly feels surreal. But what is most exciting isn’t the wisdom we have departed on you….it’s how much YOU have taught US. From nothern California to the south of France, you girls have taught us some of the best lessons we have learned in our entire lives. Thank you to all of you, you are our inspiration and why we do what we do!
So, without further ado, these are the lessons we learned from all of you over this past year.
Oh yeah, successful couples definitely fight. Definitely. And they aren’t afraid of it one bit. Because what successful couples know that most others don’t, is that fighting makes the snarking go away. Arguments unleash what’s at the heart of misunderstandings and sarcastic side comments. Any hidden feelings are shoved right out into the spotlight and are forced to be acknowledged. And once everything is left out in the open…the only way to move, is forward. And, wouldn’t ya know it, all of those small problems vanish. Craaaazy business.
So….yep, that’s most likely why happy couples also aren’t afraid to exclaim, “RELATIONSHIPS TAKE FREAKING WORK.”
Although happy couples aren’t afraid to spend a night hashing it out, they also bounce back at an exceptionally fast rate. There’s no grudge holding, no pouting, no resentment, and definitely no rebound fight introducing itself around 10 pm on a Saturday night. (Gah those are the worst).
Successful couples honestly don’t have time for that. They know that when a fight is over, it’s time to say sorry and get on with their lives. Apologizing is incredibly important to establish respect, empathy, problem solving, and the fact that they were LIST-EN-ING. They don’t skip over it, that is, unless they want to keep goin’ at it. And once those two golden words are out of the way, it’s game time. Here’s lookin’ at you, date night.
Just like you don’t compare your dog to someone else’s dog, successful couples don’t compare their relationship to someone else’s relationship. Love trumps comparison. Successful couples love their idiosyncrasies and complicated layers, so they naturally realize the frequency of other’s fights or the size of a wedding ring doesn’t have anything to do with them. Their happiness and success is only measured by their own opinions, and it is never based on how their friends’ relationships are doing.
Plus, if there were reallyyyyy a competition, you know who would win.
While keeping the other person’s feelings in mind, these couples aren’t afraid to speak pretty dang honestly with one another. They have made an agreement that they can share their needs and wants without a huge steaming side of defensiveness. This doesn’t mean they have to tell each other EVERY SINGLE DETAIL OF EVERY SINGLE THING…but it does mean that they feel comfortable in sharing whatever they need to. Everyone has their limits, ya know?
Whether they see a relationship counselor together, or they seek out their own individual method of self help, they get it done. Successful couples know that the key to taking care of each other, is to take care of themselves. They don’t let their own emotional crap pile up and soil the relationship. (Ew). Instead, they face their baggage on a daily basis, and work hard to make sure they are the healthiest version of themselves possible.
Happy life, happy wife. (See what I did there?).
Successful couples might know all about each other’s exes and crazy experiences and not so flattering episodes…but they certainly don’t hold it against each other. They appreciate each other’s exes. Yes, really. They appreciate that these people molded their partners into the people they are today.
And…well…also…there’s that little chance that exes make us look like rockstars.
Overall, successful couples don’t spend their relationship in the past. They choose to be secure in their current relationship They reflect on their previous experiences, share a few deep moments and light laughs, and move forward.
Although physical space usually isn’t up for grabs, alone time is. During heated conversations, long vacations, or any other time that might merit some alone time, they jump for it. They realize although it’s healthy to be together, it may not be healthy to be together 24/7. Cause otherwise, they would most likely want to pull their hair out every other second.
*On another note, it’s not lost on successful couples that most likely, one is probably an Introvert and one is an Extrovert. That’s typically how it goes. So, they embrace their personalities without letting it offend the other. The introvert is allowed to skip the party while watching The Mindy Project (OK fine..that’s me..) while the Extrovert can go to the party without feeling like they’re leaving the other behind. They can do their own thing without a humongous fight. And it works. Swimmingly.
Successful couples gratefully accept help in any way, shape or form. When one partner offers to help the other, there isn’t any “help shaming.” Help is accepted at all times and forms, because it’s nice. Successful couples realize that help shaming creates resentment and oddly enough…little desire for the other to help. Imagine that! So, if one offers to help do the dishes, you ignore the soap still lingering on the plates. If one makes the bed and forgets the decorative pillows, you will survive.
And, last but not least, when Rachel tries to make a trifle but accidentally halves it with shepherds pie, you let it go. Poor baby girl tried really, really hard!!!
Now, even though Blush recognizes that love languages are a pit of pop culture, they still hold some truth. To summarize quickly–here are the Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, accompanied by examples:
1. Words of Affirmation
Compliments–you are so smart, you look pretty
2. Acts of Service
Tasks–taking out the trash, picking one up from the airport
3. Receiving Gifts
Presents–buying her a necklace or him a new shirt
4. Quality Time
Date night–individual time together
5. Physical Touch
Cuddling!!!!! Hand holding!!!!
Even though pretty much everybody likes all 5 languages, we tend to prefer one or two over the rest. Successful couples know their partner’s love language, and try very hard to practice it. Hardly ever do partner’s love languages match, so it’s important that they understand their own, but adjust their actions to reflect their partner’s.
To sum up, if you need relationship coaching—you should join Blush. Now.
It’s time to head off to school, and everything is about to change. To make sure you have a leg up on your studies, organizations, and social thangs, follow us. We’ve got your back. Here are a few tips for college freshmen to make sure your transition is super smooth.
Frankly we don’t care if you’ve already got your crew–suck it up and join some clubs. You’ll meet new people AND you’ll actually have something to put on your resume other than “college student.” PLUS, having a leadership position is totally in the cards for you as a junior or senior….and you get major networking opportunities in your future. Who knows, these kids might help you land a job one day. Student Government, anyone? (YES WE WERE IN STUGOV DON’T JUDGE OK?)
Sewwww we’ve had questions recently about how life coaching works, what it’s like, and how it’s different than traditional counseling. And although coaching looks very different for each fabulous individual, we figured the best way to explain the process was through a clever (ish?) blog. Because that’s how we roll. So here is what you need to know about life coaching, and why it’s probably the BEST IDEA YOU WILL EVER HAVE IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE.
If you think you’re already confident – good! We do, too. But it’s not the perfect grades or the sweet careers that make us confident girls. Nope. It’s all in the little things that sets us apart. Some of us are born with killer confidence, and to them, we say JEALOUS. But for the rest of us, the girls who sometimes have a harder time believing in ourselves–these are for you.
We’ve noticed that these 10 qualities of confident girls are common in a lot of our clients, and they’re simple to adapt. If you need some extra help, girl, you know that’s what we’re here for. And if you ever feel that jerkface insecurity sneaking back, skim through this list, and check out the qualities of confident girls.
I mean, we like, love the bajeezus out of you girls. You know it. We know it. It’s all good. And to show our love, we wanted to share with you the most random, life changing, and fabulous tips & tricks we have discovered over the course of our quirky little lives. Some are serious, some are really really not…but all in all, we hope they make your life way easier, and more fun. These 65 tips and tricks for girls will hopefully be life-changing. Not to be dramatic or anything.
BTW–Shout out to one of our own girlfriends for sharing with us a darling article skipping around the Internet–the obvious inspiration for our own fantastic list. So go ahead—read that one, and then come back and tell us ours is better.
Just kidding. But we did add 5 tips just for good measure.
Without further ado, our 65 tips and tricks for girls. Enjoy!