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 We all hate to love Facebook.

It’s our social compass! Our guilty pleasure! We can figure out who’s dating who, who does what, who goes where, and of course, whatever Huffington Post happened to ramble about the day before. It’s not lost on us that most of you are probably reading this from a link posted on Facebook. So obvi, we love it. Best believe. Here are the top five times Facebook is annoying. Super. Annoying.

But what about when we just want Facebook to shut up? There are times in our lives when Facebook drives us up a wall, but we’re so used to logging on that we can’t seem to quit. Oh, we’ve been there. Blush has a list of times of when you are most likely to rip your hair out online, and what you can do about it (besides join Blush). Ugh.

 

1. When everyone’s coupled up.

The online world is pretty simple: single guys peruse girls, and single girls peruse couples. Le duh. And sometimes, it just sucks. Try being happy for the whole world and their boyfriends/fiancees/husbands/lovers (?) when you don’t have anything romantical to post in rebuttal. It’s okay to admit that sometimes, it just ain’t gonna happen.

Facebook isn’t a social media outlet anymore–it’s an online dating portfolio. We can see when a couple first met, when they made it FBO after the DTR (that’s right, we know the lingo), and when it got serious. (MUST. CHECK. IN. EVERYWHERE.) We stalk the proposal, gush over the showers, but above all, we go all Rachel Berry over the wedding.

We are so grateful social media allows us to creep on these precious moments….but sometimes….that’s all we need to push us over the edge. And when I say “push us over the edge,” I obviously mean devouring every last bit of junk food in the house. It’s okay. Sign-off, eat your food, and remember that your life is amazing with or without an engagement album. You are killing it out there, and you’re doing it by yourself (or with Blush’s help because you’re a smart lady). We don’t need boyfriends right now just because everyone else seems to have them. We just need to get off Facebook.

2. When you don’t love your job (…or don’t have one)

You know those posts. The ones that go something like…

“Over packed for my work trip to France! So, how did I get my 2 trunks checked onto a flight? Easy! Schmooze, walk her through our most recent Spring catalog, and give her your personal email to send her contact info for a free blouse. Made it!!”

Oook.

One, she has a cool job in fashion. Props. Two, she gets to travel. Nice. Three, she has a lot of clothes to put in those trunks. Jeal-ous! Four, I am now depressed.

Kidding, but really. It is so difficult to think positive when your job sucks or is nonexistent, and you’re faced with these posts every day. So what are we to do when we see those little gems? Breathe. Remember you have your own individual path, and any setbacks are necessary to get you where you need to be (even if it’s not schmoozing some air flight attendant with free clothes).

You need motivation to change your life, and maybe having a less than ideal career at the moment is your ticket to something better. Let her have her humble brag (or regular brag), and you go on knowing better things are in store.  Plus, Blush is like, totally awesome at career coaching. Join us, and you can do eet.

3. When You Just Went Up a Pant-Size

We all fall off the wagon. Maybe it’s Christmas. Maybe you got a month long cold and stayed away from the gym. Maybe you just felt like it (guilty). For whatever reason you don’t feel like your best physical self, Facebook is never your friend during this time. Exhibit A:

#kale #diet #paleo #workout #sweat #lunge {insert bikini pic}{insert gym selfie}{insert tight dress shot}

Not so fun to see when we don’t feel so hot about our own bikini bods. Of course we know that these users are just trying to inspire others, but it’s still nerve wracking to see 50 reminders a day that we aren’t looking our best. Please, please remember that certain angles can make anyone look better, that we all go through periods of weight gain and loss, and that…ain’t nobody gonna post a bikini pic without the right filter and diet. (Amen.)

You’ll get back to where you want to be, and you’ll do it your own way. You can use these posts for motivation (brave souls), or you can just ignore it. If you want help, sign up! We won’t make you feel bad.

4. When your ex starts dating. Or gets engaged. Or…married.

NO COMMENT NECESSARY.

5. When you’re broke

It’s sad when you don’t have the money to do all the fun things your Facebook friends do. We want to go to Hawaii! And go out for nice dinners! And buy that bag! And that necklace! And those SHOESSSS gimme. But alas, we can’t. We don’t have any monies.

It’s ok. Chin up! Your life is not defined by all the places you go or the things you have. Facebook is defined by that. And do you want your life to be defined by Facebook? Told ya. If you live to post, we got bigger fish to fry. Simply create a life that you are proud of, no matter what is shared on Facebook. (By the way, did we mention that Blush coaching is super cheap? We did? Oh, ok.)

Hope you all found some validation, encouragement, and humor in our Facebook rant. Oh, and since we know you all are always on the site anyway, would you mind liking us on Facebook?

Haha. Just kidding. (Kind of.)

 

Did this post strike a nerve? Maybe feel stuck or frustrated with your life? No worries. We have too. Join us today and we’ll help you get to where you want to be. Blush you!

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Kali Rogers is the Founder, Janitor, and CEO of Blush. You can stalk her on Instagram or ask her whatever you want via email. She loves the attention.